I don’t think I’ve ever written a post about fast food. I think I’ve taken fast food for granted my entire life just because it’s been around and never sat down to really evaluate places. Most times, I end up going to some spot to fulfill a craving or because it’s nearby. Other times, I resort to fast food because I get really lazy as a result of work, bad schedule or just being unwilling to cook. That said, I read an old post on Reddit that triggered my desire to write something on fast food because one person, who wasn’t from California, asked about Jack-in-the-Box vs Carl’s Jr. I figured this might be a good moment to evaluate a variety of fast food joints based on my experience.
First, let me preface this blog by saying part of this write up is due to a bad craving for hamburgers that I’ve had lately. There are a few spots in my neighborhood serving fast food burgers but I’m not the type that goes to the same joint consecutively. I need variety even when a particular place may be superior to my other choices. Also, the bulk of the places are spots that I use the drive thru. There’s other fast food type of spots but I’m going to tackle the big ones.
McDonald’s
Ah, the classic golden arch. If there’s one guarantee about McDonald’s, it’s that you can practically find this chain everywhere. At the most extreme for myself, I’ve been to the one out in Tokyo. For the most part, the menu stays consistent and the flavor is the same. However, there might be local specials like in the case of McDonald’s in Japan. Seeing a shrimp burger was different or the teri burger (wish they brought that one over).
However, because these are licensed, the reality is that the quality can really be hit and miss. The ones in Japan were consistently good while the ones in LA can bring cold, stale fries, which defeats part of the purpose of hitting one of these spots up. At least in my experience, I’ve never had a bad order where my order gets completely bungled. Also, I think the McDonald’s mobile ordering app is the best one I’ve seen where you can get the best discounts and use points for real deals.
As far as burgers go though, this is really middle of the road. Back in the day, Wendy’s had a commercial where they would ridicule McDonald’s with “Where’s the beef?” Other spots would poke fun at their low end hamburger as being nothing more than a hockey puck. And let’s be honest: outside of price point, there’s better spots for burgers if you want quality.
In terms of breakfast, McDonald’s isn’t bad. They do have a special spot with their McGriddle sandwiches. Those can be decadent with the little maple syrup injections that counterbalance the salt of the protein and cheese. Their deluxe or big breakfast are good these days simply because sit down restaurants have gotten ridiculously expensive. Otherwise, only if you have nothing else and really want breakfast, this pretty much is an okay option.
Then you have the annual McRib sandwich which in truth isn’t that great. You probably could get some bread and dump a Hungry Man pork rib with a few pickles and save yourself a few bucks. But because it’s only available around Christmas, by the time it comes around again, you probably have forgotten just how bad this thing is.
I suppose for myself though, the main things I do enjoy from McDonald’s are the Chicken McNuggets and fries. Ever since the Chicken McNuggets were introduced, I’ve been having them with most of my meals. And unless you’re just getting a dessert, I can’t see a McDonald’s meal without fries. It’s a staple.
Burger King
Burger King generally has been McDonald’s primary competitor. However, there aren’t nearly as many locations and the quality has gradually sunk over the years. Their main seller has been their Whopper because other places can and have done it better. So for me, I only order Burger King when there’s little other options around and I have an odd craving for a burger. But the prices aren’t worth the trouble. The only things that I might want on very rare occasion are the chicken parmesan sandwich. I think they got rid of it a while back but the one from the 80s was fantastic. Just looking it up, I see that it was once called the “Italian chicken sandwich”. Beyond that the onion rings have been their other staple but the problem is that they cause you to have the worst gas attacks on the planet after a day of digestion. I feel sorrow for anyone with a 10 mile radius of a person who consumed those things because the after effects would rival the recent LA fires in terms of debilitating air quality.
Wendy’s
I read that Wendy’s is part the big 3 of burger chains. And it is interesting to note that I have eaten there when I was living in Japan, which makes this chain pretty global. Since one opened up nearby, I started getting a meal or two, despite my unhappiness with regards to their price. That said, I think their burgers are fine as is and the foil paper keep them warm, which makes them different to other chains. The fries are natural cut and closer to steak fries with a generous portion of salt. But I think between McD’s, BK and Wendy’s, the one thing that Wendy’s does better than the other two is a good spicy chicken sandwich. Admittedly, I haven’t had one in sometime but most people think there’s is one of the better fast food ones around.
Now, the other major differentiator for Wendy’s is that they sell chili. The problem about their chili for me though is that an infamous incident that was proven to be a hoax permanently turned me away from Wendy’s chili. In that hoax, a crazy, fraudulent woman over in Reno, NV (why are there so many like her out there?) filed a false claim that she discovered a half eaten finger in her chili. From there on out, the incident was known as the “Wendy’s Chili Finger” incident and the name alone grossed me out. I do admit that I used to enjoy it but it’s impossible for me to imagine the chili being stirred around without someone’s digit swimming around.
Jack in the Box
Jack in the Box for me is the ultimate hit and miss shop around. I don’t think it’s as wide spread as the other spots I mentioned but they’ve had some of the most aggressive commercials over the years. These days I really see no reason to eat there except for late night because many run 24/7 and can be found frequently in the South Bay. In the past, Jack in the Box probably was the cheapest of the bunch but with the inflation those old sub $6 prices are long gone.
At least, in my view, Jack in the Box is one of the worst popular fast food joints around. The quality generally is at the bottom and the workers seem to be your average ham-n-eggers who need extra income. I’ve had a lot of orders messed up from this place and the food seems pathetic for what you pay (especially now). Their burgers might be some of the worst constructions with sauce spilling out and their decadent tacos either have too much sauce or none at all. Unfortunately for me, it’s generally my only choice when I want something quick at my weird hours and I almost always regret it the following day.
That said, the thing I like about JitB (outside of the 24/7 hours) is they have odd items you can’t find elsewhere. Like decadent tacos (where I think South Park got the whole “DOG SHIT TACO!” that Cartman screams in the South Park movie), eggrolls and a teriyaki bowl. They’ve done a lot of experimenting in the past too, somethings I wish they would bring back because they were so unique.
Truthfully, I think these days Jack in the Box is the premiere late night stoner joint. I’ve seen some shady characters at odd times at the one I go to and some of those people don’t even have a car or are asking me to order for them while holding an alcoholic beverage. I think if there were still more 24/7 spots around, you wouldn’t see these characters just hanging around these spots.
Carl’s Jr.
I know Carl’s is owned by another company. But they’ve always been just Carl’s Jr. to me. For quite a while, especially during the 80s and arguably up to the 90s, they were one of the better quality fast food burger joints around. Their big selling point were the charbroiled burgers which in the 80s were fantastic, even better than Burger King’s. Their classic to me was their Western Bacon Cheeseburger which was amazing with bacon, BBQ sauce and onion ring. When this place used to have a restaurant style sit down location over in Del Amo Mall, they also had a little hot dog bar to the side which was decent. I don’t think any other Carl’s Jr. had one like that.
Unfortunately, it seems that Carl’s Jr. like other major fast food companies succumbed to corporate practices with increasing their marketing and the decrease of food quality. While I still enjoy the Western Bacon Cheeseburger and Santa Fe chicken burgers, everything else about Carl’s feels generic and soulless. I wasn’t keen on the Green Burrito integration as the Green Burrito was awful.
It’s sad how this place went from one of my favorites to something I tolerate hitting up just because it’s up the street because the prices are outrageous. My old bud back in college used to get their Famous Star for $1 every day. He would tell me “It makes me happy.” These days that’s not even possible.
In-N-Out
If you’re from California, you know this is our franchise, our staple and our pride and joy when it comes to burgers. Yes, a spot like Five Guys might taste a little better or have extra customization options, but from an overall old school, reasonably priced, solid service and consistently high quality burger, you won’t find anything better than In-N-Out. In-N-Out symbolizes the KISS principle at its best. They don’t have many options on their menu nor on their “not-so-secret” menu, but what they do is excellent.
And some people might not consider In-N-Out really fast food due the line you may see. But they have a methodology and the lines are always moving. It’s just that these places are really popular. When you get your food, it’ll be hot (unless you need to drive far) and their fries are fresh. Most of all, you never get a horrible greasy feeling in your stomach after you eat here. The ingredients are fresh and you feel like you can eat here almost every day because you don’t regret what you get.
Price-wise, they had to raise it over time but it’s not egregious considering what you get at other spots. There is no mobile ordering from what I can tell but why do that? This place is a real throwback to the 50s diner experience and I love it.
Five Guys
Now, that I referenced this place, I might as well review it. I would have ranked Five Guys much higher if it wasn’t for the fact that the prices are ridiculous. I haven’t been here in ages but if this place raised their prices in parallel to other fast food places, then you’re really better off going to a sit down restaurant and ordering a top end steak. At least back when I started coming to Five Guys, I did enjoy what I got. Quality-wise, admittedly, the burgers tasted better than In-N-Out overall because you could customize them with stuff like mushrooms or steak sauce. And like Wendy’s, Five Guys burgers were wrapped in a foil paper to keep the burgers warm. So I can’t complain about the actual food itself.
Also, I had, on a few occasions, the hot dogs. They do an interesting thing in splitting the dog in half to grill the interior. They put a nice little sear which gives the hot dog a nice flavor especially in sharing the grill with burgers and bacon. Then there’s the steak fries. They give you A LOT of fries. But they’re a huge cost in themselves. And they’re good initially but when the burger takes that much of a center stage and fills you up, the fries only feel like a wasted after thought that a good compliment.
The other issue about Five Guys is that I’ve never seen a drive thru version. All the ones are located in part of a mall or some sit down spot. So at that point, you’re not really dealing with fast food anymore but more of a middle of the road restaurant spot.
Wienerschnitzel
Wienerschnitzel is a really niche spot when you get a craving for hot dogs. In truth, you probably are better off just grabbing some Nathan’s or Ballpark franks and buns and doing this on your own. However, they have some combos that include their own chili where if you have that craving for chili as more of a topping than a side, this place does an okay job at fulfilling that desire.
The problem is that the food is on par with Jack-in-the-Box where it really is on the low end of the spectrum for fast food. The burgers are not good at all but it’s one of the few fast food spots that does a chili burger. Of course, the reason you might hit a Wienerschnitzel is that you can get combos of dogs and burgers, doing a mix n match setup. The hot dogs, burgers and corn dogs aren’t really big so you can order say two chili dogs and get a chili burger with some fries. Or maybe you want two corn dogs and chili fries.
That said, I hesitate to come here. There was an old cartoon from the Spike n Mike Animation festival that had some teenage pock mocked kid working at a fast food joint serving up curly fries who ends up deep frying his fingers. That video reminds me of the average person I’ve seen working at this spot. The service in my experience isn’t great at all maybe near the bottom of the barrel near Taco Bell or Jack in the Box. I keep imagining some kid working in the back popping a zit and the pus shooting into the chili. Only when I’m absolutely desperate and have a rare craving will I ever come here.
Del Taco
The Del has been a favorite of mine since high school. There was one across the street from my old home that I would hit up for years. Then at UCI we had one around the corner and another one near one of my early dot com jobs. Between Taco Bell and Del, I’ve always preferred Del. The quality seems a little higher and when Taco Bell started to be accused of selling the “pink meat” Del was just a little higher on the quality scale. But their tacos are pretty decent for what you get with the high cheese, lettuce and cut tomatoes being reasonably fresh. Their burritos are decent too and I think they have a better red sauce than Taco Bell inside of them.
Their chicken soft tacos were much better before but aren’t bad still and if you have the money these days, their fish tacos aren’t bad. They also actually do a pretty decent burger surprisingly. I would argue that the Del Taco burger could be comparable to a Five Guys burger in terms of taste if you couldn’t customize either and had similar ingredients. Also, Del Taco serves some decent chili fries which I think are better than Wienerschnitzel’s.
I used to have what I would call the “Del Taco price index” where I’d measure inflation against the price of their two taco + quesadilla + drink combo that used to sell for $2.99. Unforutunately, that combo is long gone since they decided to pair up every meal with fries instead. I think their fries changed over the years too but they aren’t bad. Just not as good compared to 30 years ago. It’s sad that this place’s price shot up because I would go there more frequently if they were still at the cost of the 90s.
Taco Bell
You can’t mention Del Taco without mentioning the main taco joint that has become part of the American vernacular. And I sincerely had been a MUCH bigger fan back in the day. The problem is that Taco Bell became far too corporate and focused on optimizing their supply chains to the point where the food, if you call it that, only serves a purpose of existing when you’re desperate and need something relatively cheap along these lines. There is no quality you can associate to Taco Bell anymore and most of the confections are nothing more than some gooey mess that gets merged together with several sauces that resemble something you’d see in the later parts of the 2001 Stanley Kubrick movie where the two astronauts eat the unappealing, indistinguishable poop they scoop up from their futuristic trays. I mean there’s no doubt Taco Bell (or rather than Yum Corporation) like McDonalds, will be one of the few survivors in the future in terms of persisting brands that in all likelihood would eventually turn their garbage into pure paste.
And it’s sad because in the 80s and maybe part of the early 90s, the food wasn’t bad. I would dare to say I actually miss it too! Long gone are favorites like the Bell Beefer, the Enchirito, the Chilito, Double Decker Taco, etc. I know there’s been a few returns like the Mexican Pizza (which I’m sure irritated a few callous executives in their precise number crunching for bottom line profits) but even though only would serve to remind one that the current output only serves as a marketing tool for nostalgia rather than recapturing the spirit of the original items. Like I gave the Meximelt a try because it resurfaced and it was awful. You might as well just order the cheese roll up at that stage.
But the one consistency about Taco Bell that has carried over the years is the aftermath. It does become a contest between Del Taco and Taco Bell in which spot produces the worst following day. Remember the infamous Day After movie? Perhaps, the maker wasn’t thinking about the Cold War but had a premonition of the future of fast food after eating at one of these places. The thing is that I don’t think even cockroaches could survive the aftermath of some people’s consumption from these places.
Arby’s
Arby’s is such a weird place because it really has managed to pull off its own niche. Maybe the proper competitor to Arby’s would be more like a Subway, but even then Arby’s sandwiches and food are not a 1:1 replica. It’s more like an intermediate between burgers and a Subway-like spot where you get burger style buns but mix them with thin slices of beef (mostly) and add stuff like melted cheese sauce. I think this place is actually closer to the East coast pit beef without the smokey flavor.
Of course, there’s much more than just beef sandwiches like gyros or their Reuben. I do like their French Dip just because it’s nice little thing to get on a cold day with warm Au Jus. And for the longest time, I thought they had the best curly fries. Sadly, they don’t serve the melted cheese sauce on the side, although I suspect you probably can order it because they still have the cheese sauce for their beef n cheddar sandwiches.
The other thing that I enjoy getting is their cherry turnovers. These are actually pretty tasty. They used to have some darn good shakes but the ones I really liked (the pineapples one) is long gone.
I did see that they have burgers too but I don’t see a point outside of desperation if nothing else is available. Same thing with their chicken strips or whatever.
Unfortunately, Arby’s is another spot that has elevated their price to the point where I rarely venture here any longer. It’s more of a rare treat and I do miss the place. Also, because it’s so out of the way and there’s few locations, I can only go to one spot when I’ve run out of the places to go and have that odd craving. I will say that in looking at their gyro sandwich, I might have to try that in the near future. Just no red onion for me.
I could go on for other spots like El Pollo Loco or KFC, but this post is going a bit long. I might talk about those places if I decide to do a chicken fast food review but I tend to eat chicken less than burgers.
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