Here, we are once again doing another top 10 by Keith list with regards this time to fast food burgers. I might be missing out on a few that should be here or that my taste are very regional (SoCal). But just based on my criteria of price, speed, quality, consistency, availability, etc. I’ve come up with a small list that I think isn’t unreasonable.
10 – McDonald’s
If this list were just about price, then McDonald’s would rank higher. Unfortunately, quality-wise, McDonald’s is pretty mediocre and mostly deserves a spot because of how you can get the same thing all around the world for a reasonable price. It’s just that there’s nothing really to write home about beyond the fact that they’ve got a formula and it works. I think as far as burgers go, there used to be a joke (maybe by Wendy’s?) in terms of the quality of their paddies being akin to a “hockey puck.” Obviously, no one can forget Wendy’s ripping on McDonald’s (mostly) with their 80’s “Where’s the beef?” commercials. That said, they are reliable and when I get the odd craving along with desiring some Chicken McNuggets, McDonald’s is an easy drive up the street where I can these days deliver a code and have my order ready at the drive thru.
9 – Jack-in-the-Box
Before pandemic with the food crisis, Jack-in-the-Box would’ve been the top ranked spot for sheer price and availability. These days unless you get their Midnight Munchie Meal, you’re out of luck when it comes to price because this place definitely doesn’t have high quality food. That said, I do enjoy their Double Jack and Buttery Smashed Jack. I think with the Double Jack, it became a recent thing for me just wanting a basic burger with some lettuce and tomatoes rather than just condiments and cheese. And the Buttery Smashed Jack isn’t that bad either.
In the old days when I would venture here at odd hours to get a cheap late night snack, I would get their Bacon Ultimate Cheese Burger, Sourdough Jack or Jr. Bacon Cheeseburger. These aren’t great and the Sourdough Jack in particular has gone down in quality and size over the years, but they’re not healthy either. I mean Jack-in-the-Box isn’t really known for the healthiest selection but it’s more of a late night thing when there’s almost no choices around, which is why it gets a slightly higher ranking than McDonald’s.
8 – Burger King
In the 80’s, Burger King would have been ranked much higher mostly due to lack of competition and having the better burger compared to McDonald’s. Also, Burger King had some non-burger options as well as onion rings. But their fame came from the charbroiled flavor they were known for along with having a bigger size. These days, they just seem expensive and out of the way. The last time I recall having Burger King was during a late night drive thru run and it was a pain in the ass to get there. They had better locations in the 80’s for me like one at Del Amo Mall. So that alone made me de-rank them.
I suppose though nostalgia more than anything made me vote them up higher and they still boast the best onion rings, despite the deathly after effect to your neighbors (unless you intend some sadistic vengeance plot)
7 – Del Taco
Surprisingly, Del Taco does a really solid cheese burger. If you get one of these with some chili fries and maybe another side, you’re in for a nice little fast food meal. I’m glad that they have continued to sell these because once in a while, I’ll get that craving for some cheap tacos with chili fries and need one additional side. Lastly, Del Taco does decent fries so you can get something competitive to other major spots.
6 – Wendy’s
Of the major fast food burger chains, Wendy’s is probably the best quality overall. They have gotten ridiculously expensive and I still can’t forgive the infamous “chili finger” incident. But just focusing on the burgers alone, they still aren’t bad. I think the Dave’s Combo is one of the better standard burgers in that genre. The foil paper wrapping to retain heat for their burgers make them stand out. But $26 for a double Baconator, Fries, drink and 10 piece chicken nuggets is ridiculous. Luckily, that meal got turned into two.
5 – Carl’s Jr.
While I did point out that Wendy’s being one of the major fast food chains is the best in that category, I separated Carl’s Jr. on the basis that they aren’t global. I can find a Wendy’s in Japan but I can’t say the same for Carl’s Jr. That said, I’ve always had a soft spot for my favorite burger of all time, the Western Bacon Cheeseburger. Yes, it’s gone down hill in quantity but I’m glad that they still serve it for those days where I get that specific craving. That burger alone made me give Carl’s Jr. a high ranking. It’s a shame that the price has inversely gone up in relation to their quality. But I know Carl’s Jr. has that one burger that periodically I need to get and there’s nowhere else that does it better to be honest.
4 – Fatburger
I’ve only had Fatburger over in Santa Monica back when I worked out there. But this place is pretty darn good for what you get. I think I’ve tried them with chili and was impressed by the taste. I think though they were expensive (partly due to location in being on the Promenade) but definitely the best burger over there. The main issue is that you can’t find them everywhere and the next closest one is further up in Redondo Beach along PCH, which is a terrible road to drive just for a chili burger.
3 – Five Guys
If quality were the main grading aspect for me, Five Guys would take #1. Definitely, one of the top, if not THE top quality burger you can get as what maybe considered a fast food style of burger. The meat is almost like a steak and hey you can order mushrooms and steak sauce with it. The toppings are pretty amazing which makes these burgers special (the few times I get to have them these days). Again, the primary issue is price. So if I do want to hit one of these up, it’s for a very special occasion not to mention that there’s only one within a reasonable distance of where I live.
2 – Tommy’s Original
Probably, one of the most decadent burgers out there, Tommy’s Original is something that’s possibly more infamous than anything. I would say that their greatest asset is their chili which they put on most things. Also, they use a peculiar oil that makes their food drip like an alien’s acid through their paper and color everything in an ungainly orange. That said, if you don’t mind the heartburn, Tommy’s Original is one of the best tasting burgers for that chili. A friend of mine who attended Caltech and knew about Tommy’s Original out there (maybe one of the earliest ones setup) mentioned how they were infamous for only cleaning the grill once a year to avoid the annual inspection from nailing them. But every time, when Caltech students dared to venture into Tommy’s for a late night eat, they would instantly regret it the follow day (or week)
Unfortunately, most of the times I’ve managed to get Tommy’s Original was whenever I went to visit one of my aunts or on the way to Las Vegas on the 15 over at Barstow near the outlet mall. There is one over in Long Beach but I truly do not want to go out in that direction just to satisfy a rare craving.
1 – In-n-Out
When you factor in all my criteria, In-n-Out easily fulfills most of them which is why I rank them on top. Part of it was falling in love back during college due to how they had one across the street from us. There was a mini In-n-Out culture on campus and it served us well for those late night study sessions or when we’d starve and needed something quick and delicious. Luckily for me, I live fairly close to one up the street and they open late enough where I can avoid the crazy traffic and terrible drive thru. Once in a while, I’ll simply go to the Ralphs, grab my groceries and make a quick stop inside of In-n-Out.
Regardless, I can’t see anyone else taking this spot for the service, quality, location, cost, taste and what I want in a burger. I never regret going to In-n-Out which is something I can’t say about the rest of this list. Maybe I’ve regretted being in the room with someone who had animal style or grilled onions on their burger earlier, but not for myself.